Hey, whaddaya know! Mike Trout is another year older today.
Mike turns the big 2-3 today, which is remarkable on several levels. It’s remarkable in that he’s already accrued nearly 2,000 MLB plate appearances to this point, that after all this time he’s still one of the youngest players in the game — not to mention younger than 12 of MLB dot com’s Top 100 prospects — and that despite all his success, he’s only now entering his “prime.”
Trout, like everyone else in the world ever, shares his birthday with several people of note, including Charlize Theron, Sidney Crosby, and bygone Hungarian countess Elizabeth Báthory, whose profession is listed as “Most Prolific Female Serial Killer in History.” So that’s terrible.
Anyway, we here at Halos Daily didn’t want to let Mike’s big day pass without commemorating it in some fashion. The folks at MLB dot com already devised a solid list of 23 fun facts about Mike Trout, so rather than duplicate that we decided to make a non-exhaustive list of notable 23s that Mike Trout is better at baseball than:
- Dr. Pepper
- Stable sodium
- Chromosome pairs
- Michael Jordan
And now, a stupid poem I totally made up:
1 Mike Trout is my shepherd, I shall not want.
2 He maketh me to sit down near green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of “playing the game the right way” for baseball’s sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Oakland, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy glove and thy bat they comfort me.
5 Thou preparest an MVP campaign before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my MLB.tv feed with spoils; my cup runneth over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow you all the days of your life: so I will dwell in the house of the Trout for ever.
Feel free to set that to music.